25 Ideas for How to Let Your Friends Help
You know when you feel overwhelmed by life because of an illness or a huge life transition or simply because you said yes to too many people. That heavy weight of responsibility (possibly burnout) and feeling of helplessness affects all your systems - mental, emotional, and physical. Probably spiritual too as you question everything.
Life can be hard. Knowing we don’t have to do it alone is not the same thing as asking for help. Some of you may be in a place where receiving help is not even possible, let alone asking for help.
Why? What stops us from allowing others to help?
I have been thinking about this recently as our family heals from illness. My biggest reason for not letting others help is that I don’t want to burden anyone. I am sure there are other reasons, none of them valid. We are made for community and people want to help!
This recent experience and my conversation with Lindsay Min on The Commons with Karla podcast episode 24 confirmed that we can get better at allowing friends to help us.
Just four days after delivering her third baby, Lindsay received a diagnosis of brain cancer. Immediately her community jumped into action, handling all of the physical needs for Lindsay’s family while she underwent multiple surgeries and 112 rounds of chemo.
The support Lindsay’s friends offered (and she received) is a beautiful picture of what true community looks like and holds lessons and ideas you can implement when overwhelm and burnout happen.
Everyone will have different skills and capacity. Consider making a list of all the tasks or chores that need to get done. Ask yourself what you do at your house and assume those same tasks need to happen at your friend’s house.
Here are 25 ideas of ways to help or receive help.
Buy groceries
Make a meal or meals
Pack school lunches
Use an automated tool for signups
Keep a master calendar of tasks and people
Clean a room
Clean the house
Laundry
Vacuum and sweep
Take kids to school or activities
Entertain kids to allow for mom to sleep
Snuggle the kids
Snuggle mom
Mow the lawn
Go through mail and sort into categories
Read a book aloud to kids
Read a book or magazine to Mom
Offer to respond to emails
Clean windows
Clean the garage
Leave care package at front door
Encourage with yard signs
Communicate news using Facebook group
Have a conversation
Pray together
Helping someone and receiving help from someone give joy and energy. The connection you experience goes beyond the tangible actions and physical completion of a job. A meal made by a loving friend tastes better. Seeing your clean windows reminds you of the care of another. Knowing your children are cared for while you are fighting a battle or trying to survive another day is priceless. Receiving help shows you your worth to others and shows their unconditional love for you.
You get to choose. Will you soldier on seemingly handling it all or will you create space to help and be helped? You don’t have to have brain cancer to need or get help. Use this list of ideas to get started today.
